


i can't help but love you

by LITOLHAO



Series: war of hearts *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ [1]
Category: TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Adorable Choi Soobin, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Gay, Guard x Prince Au, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Pining Choi Yeonjun, Prince Choi Yeonjun, Prince! Yeonjun, Romantic Fluff, Royalty, Soft Choi Soobin, Soft Choi Yeonjun, They make out a lot lol, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Yeonjun has daddy issues, Yeonjun tries to jump off a window to find soobin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:02:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21858754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LITOLHAO/pseuds/LITOLHAO
Summary: “Yeonjun?” The deep voice pierces through him almost immediately. His head turns to the door and the guards are nowhere to be seen. Standing there was only Soobin, handsome Soobin in his tight pants and loose polo that was the same color of parchment. And all Yeonjun could think of was, home, and he almost let out a sob of relief until he realized he was teetering on his window sill and if he moved further to the left, he would fall. And die.Yeonjun shrieks so loud that Soobin hurriedly comes to his side and helps him off the ledge, the warmth of his palm curling on Yeonjun’s slim waist, heavy and comforting. “Oh my god, Yeonjun, what the hell are you doing?!”AU where (Prince) Yeonjun is found by the (Head/Captain of the Royal Guards) Soobin, teetering on the window sill (Very Dangerously).
Relationships: Choi Soobin & Choi Yeonjun, Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Series: war of hearts *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1574785
Comments: 29
Kudos: 456





	i can't help but love you

Yeonjun’s knees had long given up and he drops to the floor, his body, along with his heart, feeling as if it had been weighed on by tons. He feels the pit of stomach dip hollowly in unease, tears falling past his tiredly sore eyes. _Please be okay, please be okay, please, please, please._

He knew he shouldn’t have talked back to his father, he had trained his sharp tongue for years to never _ever_ uncoil in haste when his father would run his mouth about how Yeonjun should live and breathe. This time though, he couldn’t help it. In their heated argument where Yeonjun doesn’t even remember how it started, his father hit a nerve, a sensitive area for Yeonjun; a low blow, for someone as regally high as a king. Despite not even bothering to remember everything else the King had said in favor of Yeonjun’s defense mechanism of forgetting hurtful memories, he remembered clear as day how his father had called Soobin, his right-hand man, his guard, his best friend, a wastethat’s been getting inside Yeonjun’s head as of late, blaming Soobin for the faults Yeonjun doesn’t even have.

In his defensive state, a heat of anger rushed through Yeonjun like never before and he had told his father, “Go fuck yourself, you old sack of shit.”

Yeonjun knew what was coming, the sound of the slap coming clearer to him than the feeling itself. He was normally used to this, his father lashing out as he stood there and had no other choice but to take it. That was until his fucktard of a dad growled and barked to the guards at standby to get Soobin, _his_ Soobin. Panic raised to Yeonjun’s heart in absolute dread and instant regret sunk into his being like cold ice. “Wait! No, please, not him!” Yeonjun brokenly cried, the sound repeated but never reaching his father’s conscience or his ears when he’s suddenly pulled away by the guards and pushed into his room by force due to all the struggling he had put up. His fists banged the carved wood of his door with so much desperation and for what it seemed like hours. The only answer received was the noise of the guards that uncomfortably shuffled in their heavy armor, and the whispered pities of the handmaidens. Yeonjun was loved by everyone around him, just as he loved them back with all his heart, and to see him in his such a desolate state behind closed doors, was a heartache to even those that served and only knew him.

“Prince Yeonjun, please, y-you know we can’t let you out. We’re— we’re terribly sorry.” The guard outside had sounded so genuine, it made Yeonjun cry even harder, his tears hushed and quieter this time. He swears, once he gets his sister Yeonsoon, to rule over the kingdom, he’s going to get her to give all the guards more leaves, more vacations, and higher pay raise.

“I— It’s fine—“ Yeonjun chokes. He murmurs a sigh against the embroidery of his sleeve. “I know I’m not allowed to go out but I just—“

A cool breeze brushes over the Prince’s nape and Yeonjun’s eyes dart from the floor to the window by his bedside and the idea comes to him. 

“It’s um, it’s fine, I’m sorry for crying, like a lot and too much.” Yeonjun tries to sound as sad as he can as he soundlessly moves through the floor, tip-toeing his way to the window sill.

The guard’s apologetic hum in response makes Yeonjun a little more nervous as he attempts to lift the glass of his window without it possibly creaking. He hooks his leg over the ledge, the dust scattering, making his skin itch. Yeonjun stares at the scenery below him, and it’s a long way to go but he was willing to do anything, even if it meant walking through hell and drinking its fire. For Soobin. All for Soobin. 

He takes a deep breath. All he has to jump and somehow manage to land safely. Yeonjun then thinks of how cats do it but then remembers he wasn’t a cat so fear starts settling in his bones. But then Yeonjun’s stupidly encouraging mind cleverly decides to tell him he was no pussy either so—

“Yeonjun?” The deep voice pierces through him almost immediately. His head turns to the door and the guards are nowhere to be seen. Standing there was only Soobin, handsome Soobin in his tight pants and loose polo that was the same color of parchment. And all Yeonjun could think of was _home_ and he almost let out a sob of relief until he realized he was teetering on his window sill and if he moved further to the left, he would fall. And die. 

Yeonjun shrieks so loud that Soobin hurriedly comes to his side and helps him off the ledge, the warmth of his palm curling on Yeonjun’s slim waist, heavy and comforting. “Oh my god, Yeonjun, what the hell are you doing?!”

_I was looking for you._

What comes out instead, “I was looking for some.. uh. Air. I needed air.”

“So what? You decided to jump off the window for it?! That’s—“ Soobin yells but the crescendo of his voice immediately falls when he takes in Yeonjun’s features. The Prince’s eyes were puffed and reddened, traces of tears lined against his tanned cheeks. Looking even further, he sees the Yeonjun’s knuckles that were bruised, the skin peeled off, and flesh throbbing. “Yeonjun…”

Soobin’s breath hitched when the Prince steps closer to his space and desperately scans Soobin’s face, looking for signs, an indication where Soobin could possibly have been hurt. They were so close that Soobin hears the worried whisperings of his Prince. “Soobin, are you okay?”

Soobin felt his chest tighten. How could Yeonjun ask him that when his eyes were marked with tears and when he himself was obviously the one hurt and not Soobin? Soobin bit the inner flesh of his skin, finding himself so _frustrated_ at Yeonjun; Yeonjun, who looked after everyone else before himself, Yeonjun, who was scarred and hurt yet never running out of worry for Soobin. Soobin feels so much when Yeonjun asks him again if he was okay, with those genuinely starred eyes of his that were blended pain and hope all at once. At that moment, it was when Soobin wanted to rip his own heart out until he could no longer breathe, so he could offer it to Yeonjun on a silver fucking platter.

“Yeonjun, how could you ask me that? Look at you—“ 

And Yeonjun tilts his head in that endearing way of his and it flips Soobin’s stomach into knots. Soobin sighs, gently grabbing Yeonjun’s wrist and guiding the latter into his bed so he could sit. He heads to one of the drawers in Yeonjun’s nightstand and pulls out the section of medical supplies. The bed dips at the weight when Soobin sits closely to Yeonjun, their thighs touching.

They stay in silence as Soobin works through the supplies, applying ointment and wrap to Yeonjun’s hand, and with Yeonjun staring into the way his hand wonderfully fits in Soobin’s and how their skins contrasted yet complemented. 

It wasn’t necessary, this part of patching up Yeonjun’s wounds. Soobin cups the Prince’s cheeks so delicately one might think it fragile and wipes the vestige of Yeonjun’s tears. _Warm_ was all Yeonjun could think of. Soobin had the warmest pair of hands he had ever come to known. To Yeonjun, it was probably the universe telling everyone that it wasn’t enough that Soobin’s heart was warm; his hands had to manifest the same warmth too. As Soobin thumbs the inner linings of his cheeks, Yeonjun couldn’t help but flush and melt under the attention.

Yeonjun thought he could handle himself well. That, of course, was until Soobin darted his tongue out and licked into the flesh of his thumb to gently brush Yeonjun’s bangs that stuck on his forehead. Yeonjun’s heart swooned while his mind rambled defensively, _what the actual fuck, that wasn’t even necessary, did he not see the basin of water literally sitting next to him—_

Yeonjun’s broken out of his homosexual stupor when Soobin faces him with a question, “What happened here, Your Highness?”

“I uh, knocked on the door too much?”

Yeonjun tries not to think of how good Soobin’s hum and tut of disapproval had sounded. _Not now, not while he’s here,_ he screams at his thoughts. 

“He… didn’t do anything to you, right?” Yeonjun would break if something bad had happened. He swears to Apollo that he’d accept anything bad that would happen to him, just not to Soobin.

“Well not physically.” Soobin sighs, expression heavy with guilt. Soobin looks at him in the eye, his own features stressed with remorse. “Yeonjun, your father he— He stationed me somewhere else. I—“ Soobin almost didn’t say the words waiting sullenly on his tongue.

“I came to say goodbye.”

Yeonjun’s stomach drops in a cold and brutally dreadful feeling. 

_No, no, no._ Everything came rushing in, all once, in a grasping haze, all the memories, their routines, how they _touched_ — every single thing. When they would eat out in the dining hall together and days where Yeonjun would feel extra needy and purposely leave food crumbs in the corner of his mouth so Soobin can wipe it off. When they would train together and spar and Yeonjun would feel left in the dust when Soobin wins for the nth time. When Yeonjun would deal with endless piles of paperwork and Soobin would come in and bring him scones or blueberries or chicken because he knows Yeonjun loves them. Not ever, would he want any of that to disappear. Because he knows if Soobin was out of his reach, everything, even Soobin himself would fade with time and crumble into dust, into _nothing._

_“No,”_ Yeonjun couldn’t stop the croak that escaped his scratched throat. His mind blanks and without thinking he blurts out in desperation, _“You said you were mine!”_

“You— you— when we met, you said, you said that!” Yeonjun cries this time, choked back sobs racking his body as he rambles with fury and anguish. “The day we met, you said all that _bullshit_ about belonging to the kingdom, to _me,_ you swore you’d never leave! That you would _always, always_ be there if I need you, so _why?_ ” Yeonjun knows he was being irrational but he felt he had every right to his words, to his feelings. He thinks of the time when he turns to a corridor and he’d see Soobin, _his_ Soobin send a smile in his way, how he’d wave at Yeonjun as his other hand lay on the helm of his sword out of habit. Yeonjun didn’t want that to end, he didn’t want to just _let go_ like it was some kind of fever dream. He won’t. He won’t _ever._

“My Prince, please—“ Soobin tries to console the Prince, but his voice is broken and hoarse as well. “I am, still yours. Nothing has changed, and not anything _can_ change that. Not even your father.” This time, Soobin gently threads his fingers through the other’s hair and brings Yeonjun’s head close to his chest, his other hand moving in to wrap itself around Yeonjun’s waist to pull him even closer until their ragged breaths and pounding hearts ring into their ears. Like clockwork, Yeonjun wraps both his arms around Soobin’s waist tightly, clinging onto him like he was afraid Soobin would disappear right then and there. 

“But you’re leaving,” Yeonjun’s out of breath whimper leaves Soobin silent. Yeonjun knits his eyes shut as he takes in sharp breaths and cries into Soobin’s chest. Soobin couldn’t do anything else but stroke Yeonjun’s unearthly blue hair gingerly and place soft almost ghostly kisses to the Prince’s forehead. For a prince and a head guard, everything was too intimate. But then again, they always were. Always testing and sinking into the waters that were already too far and deep to be ordinary friendship. I mean, what right-hand man sleeps with you when you have nightmares or graze kisses to your head whenever you’d have a panic attack? Nothing was ever said between them, and morning would come with barely any markings of the moonlit love they both shared, unspoken and hushed in blurred lines and boundaries.

“I know, love.” Soobin murmurs against the shell of Yeonjun’s ear. 

_Love,_ that was the third time Soobin had called him that. The first had been when they were both in the kitchen. Yeonjun wasn’t a brat and he took it upon himself to know how to do things himself, but the one chore he couldn’t do was cooking. This posed as a challenge to Yeonjun’s weird complex that he had to be good at everything or else his life sucked. Grabbing not only a wooden board, but some knives that varied in shape and size, a bunch of fruits and vegetables (because he’d cry if he guts open an animal), and a whole Choi Soobin so he could learn how to cook. To no one, not even the carrot’s, surprise, it was a disaster and at one point, Soobin settled for sitting on the counter and leaving Yeonjun to continue being the hurricane of a human being he was as the vegetables weren’t even vegetables anymore. Until such time Yeonjun started to practice slicing and Soobin swore he almost had a stroke when the knife was inches away from slicing Yeonjun’s entire finger instead of the goddamn apple. ‘ _Be careful, love,’_ is what he had said at the time, as the guard took away the knife from Yeonjun and began to slice the apple himself.

“I like it when you call me that,” Yeonjun confesses, his face heating up at the awfully shameful memory Soobin had to save him from.

Soobin smiles at that, “Love?”

“Yeah…” 

They don’t say anything after that but the way Soobin suddenly presses his kisses deeper into Yeonjun’s hair and how his grip on Yeonjun’s waist tightens doesn’t go unnoticed. Yeonjun all but accepts every gesture with an open heart and quite literally, with open arms, grateful for every ticking moment he has with Soobin. Soobin just has this power over Yeonjun where he doesn’t even have to try and he already wins Yeonjun’s heart and love without a shadow of a doubt.

After a while, Soobin quietly whispers. “Yeonjun, love?”

“Um, oh. God, hello, yes, Binnie... Dear?“ Yeonjun suddenly cringes, as if he was physically revolted. “Wait ew, that sounds so gross. I am never ever calling you that again. I mean it’s fine if you say it because it sounds nice on _you,_ which is completely unfair by the way because _I_ sound fucking hideous when saying it—“

“I love you.”

Yeonjun gasps, and he doesn’t mean to but he also chokes on his own spit. Tears spring up to the prince’s eyes at the admission because he loves Soobin just as much and even harder. His eyes are wide and he’s pretty sure he’s burned flame-red by now. Their ‘I love you’ was long overdue and it shouldn’t even surprise him (yeah, he sees the way Soobin looks at his ass). He looks up and sees Soobin trying not to laugh at him, like the absolute jerk he is. Yeonjun doesn’t know why but he cries even harder. How dare he, Yeonjun thinks. But then the taller’s dimples come to show and it causes Yeonjun to swoon all over again because dear god, he’s so in love. Soobin’s dimples were his absolute weakness and probably will be the cause of his downfall.

“Say it again.” Yeonjun sniffles. Yeonjun wasn’t a brat but then again, if this was the last and final time he was going to get Soobin like this, he might as well be the biggest one there is. He needs to hear it, again and again, over and over. 

Soobin’s deep chuckle reverberates through Yeonjun’s ears and it does _things_ to Yeonjun’s mind and poor heart. “As you wish, my Prince.”

_“I love you,”_ Soobin peppers soft kisses all over Yeonjun’s face, a sad smile brushing against Yeonjun’s skin when he hears him whimper out a sob. _“so, so much. With all my heart.”_ He leans down to finally push his lips against Yeonjun’s, and it’s everything Yeonjun’s ever dreamed of, to have Soobin all to himself, every piece and crevice. Yeonjun’s rendered breathless by the way Soobin kisses him, pulling and pushing, and calling out to Yeonjun in a way only they can know. Soobin runs his tongue across Yeonjun’s bottom lip and catches their lips in a swift motion again, making Yeonjun tremble and mewl softly. Yeonjun shudders at the pure intimacy of it all and it was honestly too much for it to happen all at once but Yeonjun doesn’t want it to end, doesn’t want to stop feeling the way Soobin attentively strokes his hair and brings him closer, the way Soobin licks into his lips and he feels dizzy and lightheaded but so _complete_. 

After what had felt like forever where Yeonjun’s lips were slick and glistening and swollen, the prince pulls away, panting. Soobin makes a noise of confusion, clearly wanting what Yeonjun’s other, less rational side had wanted as well. This was too important, Yeonjun adamantly tells himself when the other side of him yells at him to keep kissing Soobin. He had to tell Soobin this before anything else. “Binnie…” 

“Yes, love?”

“I love you too.”

“Mhm, love you more, my Prince.”

“Stop it,” Yeonjun whines, pushing the other’s shoulder lightly when Soobin breaks out laughing. “You’re making me feel all loved, it’s—“ The prince huffs, pouting in a way Soobin can’t resist cooing over. Yeonjun then mutters so quietly that it was barely above a whisper, “—It’s so nice.”

“You deserve nice things though.”

“Then stay.”

“Yeonjun, you know I can’t. The king will have both our heads,” Soobin tries laughing it off but the sound comes as forced, even to him.

“What if we run away, then?” This time, Yeonjun grips the hem of Soobin’s shirt. He means it. It’s not the first time that thought has ever occurred to him. Plus, it wasn’t as if he was the sole heir to the throne. The land still had his older sister Yeonsoon, who in Yeonjun’s opinion, was way more suited to become the sole heir and ruler of her own queendom because fuck patriarchy, no one wants that shit no more. He doesn’t look up to check Soobin’s reaction but he feels Soobin’s breath hitch. He was nervous about Soobin’s reaction, his heart beating a mile per minute now. He knew what the kingdom meant to Soobin, how happy Soobin was when he was made captain of the guards, how much Soobin memorizes every turn and road of the place.

“That doesn’t sound so bad.” Soobin hums and Yeonjun snaps his head to turn to Soobin in surprise. 

“Wait, really? You’re not going to lecture me about the social and political implications that would be left if we ran away?”

“Yeonsoon would be a less chaotic leader.”

“Hey!” Yeonjun sulks. It wasn’t any less true, considering Yeonjun only knows two lines from the constitution, one being the title and the other probably saying the name of their country. Soobin laughs, his heart swelling when he sees the pout on Yeonjun’s pretty lips. Soobin couldn’t help it this time when he places another kiss to Yeonjun’s lips. 

Yeonjun couldn’t wait. They can go anywhere, finally without having to be constricted in the stoned corners of his castle. Just imagining him and Soobin together, possibly living in the woods, and probably meeting a fairy (Yeonjun can’t be sure if they exist but he’ll try anyway), filled his heart with so much possibilities and love. “I can be a witch and you can be my cat.”

“I think I’d prefer to be your broom instead— ow!”

  
  


.·゜゜· ·゜゜·． .·゜゜· ·゜゜·．

  
  


The sun was high in the air, doused in white robes while lighting the tip of the kingdom like dew, and Yeonjun and Soobin were no longer in the midst of their kingdom’s cyclamen fields. 

When Soobin and Yeonjun suck out the night before dusk, no one said anything, not even Yeonjun’s stepmother who simply wished for their safety and gave them a handful of gold for their trip. Especially not the guards either when Soobin was practically _their_ boss, saluting with a bittersweet smile of farewell. As for Yeonsoon, she wasn’t all that sad. After all, she was the one entrusted with both of their whereabouts via bird in case she needed to drop by and make fun of Yeonjun every once in a while. When the king orders their search, it’s all too late. It was a foolish choice anyway because Soobin knew the kingdom like the back of his hand and knew exactly where to hide and slip through everyone’s grasp. Oh, and it helped them greatly that Yeonjun was so loved that no one had the heart to sabotage their escape. 

Needless to say, while the king threw his hissy capitalist fit, Yeonjun and Soobin were taking a break in one of the meadows that was a kingdom away from theirs, panting and making out senselessly against the back of an oakwood tree, with Yeonjun pressed up and hitched against the bark while Soobin gave and gave what he could. They had all the time in the world, now that they had the open space and endless hours to finally let love slip in.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are highly loved and appreciated ! leave some if you enjoyed hehehe <33 thank u to @ noirsproperty for proof reading this, i love u my bes 
> 
> title and series are based on the song "war of hearts" by ruelle and it's honestly the best song ever i swear it's so lovely, i recommend listening to it !
> 
> honestly, this work was the MOST SELF INDULGENT fic i have ever written and i'm so so happy to have written it :>
> 
> since i just love the guard x prince concept, another AU will be posted soon so stay tuned!
> 
> p.s. ! i'm on twitter if ever u need a mutual / someone to talk to ! (´･ω･`)
> 
> (don’t repost my work btw!! ©LITOLHAO )


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